Pressure

A boulder on my chest pushes on and on and
on in metric tons It steals my breath and leaves me
windless with my inability
to remove its pressing weight
But as I wait
and wait
and wait
for breath to come
and chest to heave
and heaviness to cease
I grope in vain against restraint
pushing back for my release
But ever crushing onward it
never lets me breathe
and steals my strength with breathlessness
and pins me with its greed

Safe Harbor

A trail of a thousand tears begins with a single drop

a step into the darkness –

where off-key hums and half-remembered songs

lull the fear and pain into temporary relief.

Safe harbor of salty water pools in your eyes,

a storm-tossed vessel waits for boarding,

a sailor considers – tossed by fear

cast overboard by self-doubt.

Tomorrow’s light may never shine on this journey,

but for now it is just what it is –

undefined like the line between the water and the sky

hazily covered by storms and darkest night.

A trail of tears ends with a single drop

a step into the darkness –

where off-key hums and half-remembered songs

lull the fear and pain into permanent relief.

Rapunzel

The quiet girl in the tower just brushes her hair

and sits by the window with nary a care,

just humming and singing and dreaming her dreams

of castles and fairies and princes and kings.

She hums and she brushes and brushes and hums

'til one day a man to her tower does come.

He'd been drawn by her song from a far distant land.

She knew he'd want nothing more than her hand

so she sang and he listened and together they talked

of all in the world she never had walked

and when the night fell she invited him in

to find refuge from darkness - the wolves and the wind.

To scale the tower, this prince couldn't dare

so the girl in the tower let down her hair.

It'd never been cut since the day of her birth -

the only thing that she had that was of any worth -

so carefully braided, a rope made with care

to bring her a prince when there weren't any stairs.

He climbed and they kissed as he entered her room.

She had dreamed of this day since she'd entered this doom

and they talked and they shared and she sang a bit more

of the world he had entered without any door.

She welcomed him in and he stayed quite a while

but one morning he left without a word or a smile.

She awoke to the cold of her body uncovered.

The hair she had worn had all just been severed.

She found it by the window where he'd made his escape

without one little word he had left her with hate.

So day after day after day she did wait

dreaming of princes and hair she could plait.

She sang at the window a song full of pain -

no matter the weather, in sun or in rain.

Not 'til she stopped singing and longing for hair,

did she awake to the prince who was building her stairs.

Now day after day after day she still sings

while walking the earth and hearing sounds ring.

And they live in a castle with stairs and with doors

and the girl from the tower has never sung more.

Fear Not, My Little One

My child, you tire of being scared– of living your life afraid of what will happen next. Over and over and over you’ve heard – have faith and don’t fear. Fear is the antithesis of faith. On and on and on.  You  proclaim your faith in a God who loves you, and I tell you now that I truly do… and yet, you still fear that your every next step will lead to paths undesirable and untraceable. How hypocritical sound your howls of anguish at decisions and crossroads! How pathetic sound your pleas of platitude! Today is today and tomorrow is tomorrow, and I WILL protect you despite your stumblings, ineptitudes, and all-out failings. When the fog rolls out and blinds your view, and we both know that it will, my hand will reach through obscurity and guide you on your way. I will save you from your faltering and comfort you in your afflictions. How dare you fear for fear is nowhere near deserved – called for – even reasonable in this situation. It is true. This path is full of scariness. It is lined with villains who break in and destroy hearts and homes, and it is filled with allies who build – and sometimes break or banish us, but who decides which is which? How to tell whether friend or foe on a darkened evening crosses the path? Only time and the steady hand of a watchful God can tell. Fear not my little one, for tomorrow is a day I have already seen, and the path will not stretch forth forever. You head to higher roads, and planes yet undiscovered lie before you. The depths of a twisting wood must be forged through to find it, but I am always with you. Through every howl of the wind, every rain that muddies the path, every villain that destroys your courage, and every ally that breaks your heart – my hand is outstretched still to steady your step, straighten your path, and save your soul.  

Morning's Longing - Autumn's Death

I passed once-flaming trees and saw

bare twigs thrust from frozen ground.

The stars had fallen - scattered leaves deteriorating

on the darkened earth.

The warmth left with the morning -

the sun rose and so did you.

The morning broke

everything we built.

I long for the comforter of evening's cool breath -

the embrace of cacophonous canopies of leaves,

but I am left in the dimmest of mornings

with no blanket or shelter from your absence

and only shivering sunshine to thaw my frozen heart.

Darkened Insulation

Tomorrow is really only as foggy as today
and light comes in only when we open
a curtain,
but curtains help keep out the cold
and windows will leak precious heat
when uncovered.
Allow the darkness to flee-
but beware the price
for a raging winter roars outside.
Must i really choose
whether to freeze in silent death
or never sleep in restless dark?

Things that make me think of you (a love poem)

Note: Katie Walter and I wrote this poem together. It was pretty fun!

Your eyes remind me of the iceberg that sank the titanic! Whoops! My bad!

You make me think of slaughterhouses and smelly gym socks-

Of Voldemort, the Volturi and other fictional villains - like Cruella deVil.

You're like the peeling skin after a bad sunburn

And smell like last week's sushi, but I like it.

Your smile blinds me like the idiots who tail me with their brights on.

Your hair reminds me of those commemorative Obama chia pets - awkward!

Your legs dance like Big Bird's - carrot sticks connecting your feet to your body.

You're as annoying as a chihuahua chasing a bacon-scented mailman.

You make me think of burnt sugar, Spice Girls, and everything evil-

Of dead flowers, cockroaches, and poisonous beetles.

I bet you snore, leave the toilet seat up, and chew with your mouth open.

Your hands are small and ineffectual-

Your soul is a black hole, but it sucks me in.

I hate you.